Perception isn't Reality

One of my friends has been telling me to really let go on this blog so after a few recent events I will give you a peak into what I really think.

I recently lost my ass and everything I have worked for.  It has been a bitch but I will bounce back once again.  But times like these are when you really find out who your friends are.  So here we go.

I swallowed my pride yesterday and asked someone that I have known most of my life for a job and their response "you need to do something besides take that shot."  You know what, fuck you.  I know I can go back to banking tomorrow and make decent money but I am not and will not!  I have worked my ass off and if someone wants to buy me a shot I am going to take and I don't give a damn about what you think.

Now you want to know what I really think about religion?  I think it is for the weak.  I can't stand it.  Don't come around me with your beliefs and ask me to pray or go to your church.  Shits not happening!  If that pisses you off think of how many times you have ask someone to pray or go to your church.  I might find that offensive but don't go off on your ass because "it's not politically correct."  I think religion was created to keep people from running around and going ape shit and also to help people sleep at night.

Since I got on that religion topic lets talk about death.  When I see the news and someone had died it doesn't bother me at all unless it is a child.  Most people who make the news had that shit coming.  And let me guess I'm the ass again for saying that?  Really do you give a fuck about the people starvivg in third world countries when you are drinking your five dollar coffee?  I have done more for charities and to help people than most of you and deep down inside is it because I really care?  Most of the time hell no, it is for perception and to make myself feel good.  Can you admit that?

Now lets get to the bar scene and women subject that I always bring up.  What I tell you is true.  There is more cheating and scandalous shit going on than you would believe.  And I'm not about to knock women right now because it is people in general.  Once again how many people do you know that have cheated?  And you sit there and smile at their significant other and don't say shit.  I'm guilty of it too.  But you know what else?  I have never cheated on anyone and never would.  I made a few huge mistakes with someone I cared about and no it wasn't even cheating but I regret it everyday.  No matter what I do I can't take it back and a lot of people formed a perception of me that really isn't me.  But once again the people who judge me or look down on me can kiss my naked white ass.  The person that was harmed by my actions knows me and how sorry I am.

Next subject, I claim to be smarted than most.  Guess what, I am not bullshitting.  Think of me what you will, call me cocky I don't give a damn.  Since I am getting a lot of shit out there I will tell you that I have met 3 people that I really believe are brilliant.  I will give them some love without putting their name is this crazy shit.  One use to be Ms. C and now she is Mrs. M, one shares the last name with a liquor that I drink all the time, and the other can hit the living piss out of a baseball.

Now that I am calming down a little the main reason that I tick, function, keep moving?  There are people who have invested a lot in me.  My family and friends pick me up when I'm down.  I have a mentor that is prob not to proud of me right now but he means a lot to me and gives me a kick in the ass when i need it.  hell i have a teacher from almost 20 years ago that i still talk to monthly and i can't face unless i make shit happen.

Finally to get my point across.  This blog really isn't that bad for what i tell my true friends.  You don't like it, please delete me from your phone, facebook and everything else.  I don't need people around me or fucking with me that can't take me for what I am.  I don't need the headaches and or drama.  Hopefully your perception of me is becoming a reality.