I enjoy being a nerd and I actually love learning random things about space and our universe. So today I read that NASA discovered an asteroid two days ago that is going to pass within 8000 miles of Earth. They said it is not going to hit us and that it is too small to do any damage anyway so don't freak out. With that being said it made me think about a few things.
People pass away everyday and lots of people on this planet aren't going to see Monday. I don't know if I am one of them but I damn sure hope not. But something does scare the hell out of me about death. It isn't the physical part or any pain that may come with it but the idea of having regrets before it happens.
What I am trying to say is I don't want to look back on my life without having accomplished a lot of things that are important to me. I am not talking about some damn "bucket list" (even though that isn't a bad thing).
I am talking about things like...
Letting the people who you care about know it
Not giving up on your dreams no matter what anyone else thinks
Not settling for someone who doesn't deserve you
If you do meet that someone let them no it and again to hell with what everyone else thinks
Trying to over come what keeps you up at night
Surrond yourself with the people and things that put a smile on your face. And finally here is a quote that someone gave me and that I have shared before that kind of sums this up.
"What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us, anything less than your best is to sacrifice the gift."
Saturday, June 25, 2011
Wednesday, June 22, 2011
I will blog you right in the kisser!
I enjoy reading a few different blogs and ran across one yesterday that I found very interesting! Not biting off anyone's material but it basically said women shouldn't put men before their friendship and if they do it usually bites them in the arse!
I will be damned but she hit the nail on the head. So today I figured I would give my opinion on some relationship issues and shat!
Let's go ahead and get the BS out of the way and talk about cheating. It happens all the time, it happened to me years ago and it is going to continue to happen. So why the hell are a lot of people still so big on marriage? I don't get it! I have pushed people away and not let people get close to me emotionally and have been called an ass by a few women that I have dated. You want to know why? Because I knew that they were not the right person for me. Not knocking them there are some great women in my past but there is no point in acting and getting too involved. Of course there are exceptions to every rule and Dip Shit already knows.
Since I like to ramble on here and I don't proof read any damn thing I might as well go ahead and throw myself under the bus and then defend myself as usual! Being single has been fun but it like everything else has it peaks and valleys. Some people may think that I have slept around? Well guess what unless you were there you don't know shit. Innocent until proven guilty! To hell with it lets go ahead and piss some people off! You want to know why people usually cheat?! If you aren't handling business in the bedroom they will go somewhere else. As I have said in the past we all have off days but if you and your significant other aren't getting busy someone else is doing it for you. Guys if your woman is into some kinky shit then you better decide if you can handle it asap! Take that trip to the porn store and buy those pills if you have to. If not that fucker on the commercial will be at your house throwing that damn football through your tire swing! Now why did I just get a little pissy?! Because I have been called a slut lately and it is starting to irritate me! Be honest, do women want some damn little altar boy in the bedroom?! Hells no, I test drive anything before I buy it! Practice makes perfect people so feel free to judge me. But as always think of all the scandalous shit you have done first and then think of all the shit you have never told your significant other!
Have a great day and I am going to go look for a new car! ha
I will be damned but she hit the nail on the head. So today I figured I would give my opinion on some relationship issues and shat!
Let's go ahead and get the BS out of the way and talk about cheating. It happens all the time, it happened to me years ago and it is going to continue to happen. So why the hell are a lot of people still so big on marriage? I don't get it! I have pushed people away and not let people get close to me emotionally and have been called an ass by a few women that I have dated. You want to know why? Because I knew that they were not the right person for me. Not knocking them there are some great women in my past but there is no point in acting and getting too involved. Of course there are exceptions to every rule and Dip Shit already knows.
Since I like to ramble on here and I don't proof read any damn thing I might as well go ahead and throw myself under the bus and then defend myself as usual! Being single has been fun but it like everything else has it peaks and valleys. Some people may think that I have slept around? Well guess what unless you were there you don't know shit. Innocent until proven guilty! To hell with it lets go ahead and piss some people off! You want to know why people usually cheat?! If you aren't handling business in the bedroom they will go somewhere else. As I have said in the past we all have off days but if you and your significant other aren't getting busy someone else is doing it for you. Guys if your woman is into some kinky shit then you better decide if you can handle it asap! Take that trip to the porn store and buy those pills if you have to. If not that fucker on the commercial will be at your house throwing that damn football through your tire swing! Now why did I just get a little pissy?! Because I have been called a slut lately and it is starting to irritate me! Be honest, do women want some damn little altar boy in the bedroom?! Hells no, I test drive anything before I buy it! Practice makes perfect people so feel free to judge me. But as always think of all the scandalous shit you have done first and then think of all the shit you have never told your significant other!
Have a great day and I am going to go look for a new car! ha
Thursday, June 16, 2011
Cheers!
I don't have too much to write about today so let's have some fun and write about more random shit!
I once stole a bartenders bottle opener then went into the bathroom and took a picture of it in my hand while holding my penis. I then sent her the picture.
I may have peed in a fireplace?!
I keep an easy button on my night stand right beside my degree that has never been framed.
I enjoy being in the nude.
I'm kind of hoping butt implants blow up like boob implants did.
I prefer brunettes but seem to get stuck on blondes.
I love accents and tans.
The batteries in my easy button are dead. haha
The white house really isn't shit anymore compared to some houses.
Could Obama paint it and call it a different color house?
Why do kids still take karate lessons? People carry guns.
How the hell did people kiss before tooth paste? Morning breathe sucks
I actually love vegetables.
If I don't remember your name I always introduce someone else to you so you will say it.
Colombus day is bullshit.
And if Christmas is a celebration of some dude named Jesus Christ being born then why do we go out and spend money that we don't have on presents? Hypocrits
Why not throw Thanksgiving in here too. We celebrate native americans teaching white people how to grow food and survive before they were slaughtered?! Ain't that a bitch, now pass the gravy.
Lots of people get less time for killing people than they do for selling drugs.
I learned in a cultural geography class 10 years ago that 1 out of every 6 people that have ever lived are alive today.
And on that note you don't think we could cure AIDS and Cancer? A man walked on the moon 42 years ago. Oh yeah thats right the world is over populated! Oh yeah, if I'm correct about 70% of AIDS cases are in Africa. Think the US gives a damn? We are living longer and poor Africans are starving and dying.
I wish there was a real Ron Burgendy (typo?)
The government would give me more money for knocking a girl up at 16 and dropping out of school. But i get a degree and have to pay for that shit. I almost bitch slapped a grown man at food lion for paying for food with his food stamp card and then spending more money on alcohol and paying cash for that. some people are shit!
I do wish death on some people and no I won't regret it if they die. i would rather have a parade. You think i'm an ass for that? How did you feel when Bin Laden died? Lots of hypocrits on my TV. He was still a man.
Bet you didn't like that comment. Try this then...would you die for your beliefs? Bin Laden did. I hate his guts and would've liked to torture him but he might not be too much different from preachers/priests/etc.
Why would someone become a clown?
As always feel free to comment or tell me to go to hell! Have a good day, love ya mean it!!
I once stole a bartenders bottle opener then went into the bathroom and took a picture of it in my hand while holding my penis. I then sent her the picture.
I may have peed in a fireplace?!
I keep an easy button on my night stand right beside my degree that has never been framed.
I enjoy being in the nude.
I'm kind of hoping butt implants blow up like boob implants did.
I prefer brunettes but seem to get stuck on blondes.
I love accents and tans.
The batteries in my easy button are dead. haha
The white house really isn't shit anymore compared to some houses.
Could Obama paint it and call it a different color house?
Why do kids still take karate lessons? People carry guns.
How the hell did people kiss before tooth paste? Morning breathe sucks
I actually love vegetables.
If I don't remember your name I always introduce someone else to you so you will say it.
Colombus day is bullshit.
And if Christmas is a celebration of some dude named Jesus Christ being born then why do we go out and spend money that we don't have on presents? Hypocrits
Why not throw Thanksgiving in here too. We celebrate native americans teaching white people how to grow food and survive before they were slaughtered?! Ain't that a bitch, now pass the gravy.
Lots of people get less time for killing people than they do for selling drugs.
I learned in a cultural geography class 10 years ago that 1 out of every 6 people that have ever lived are alive today.
And on that note you don't think we could cure AIDS and Cancer? A man walked on the moon 42 years ago. Oh yeah thats right the world is over populated! Oh yeah, if I'm correct about 70% of AIDS cases are in Africa. Think the US gives a damn? We are living longer and poor Africans are starving and dying.
I wish there was a real Ron Burgendy (typo?)
The government would give me more money for knocking a girl up at 16 and dropping out of school. But i get a degree and have to pay for that shit. I almost bitch slapped a grown man at food lion for paying for food with his food stamp card and then spending more money on alcohol and paying cash for that. some people are shit!
I do wish death on some people and no I won't regret it if they die. i would rather have a parade. You think i'm an ass for that? How did you feel when Bin Laden died? Lots of hypocrits on my TV. He was still a man.
Bet you didn't like that comment. Try this then...would you die for your beliefs? Bin Laden did. I hate his guts and would've liked to torture him but he might not be too much different from preachers/priests/etc.
Why would someone become a clown?
As always feel free to comment or tell me to go to hell! Have a good day, love ya mean it!!
Monday, June 13, 2011
"Getting Naked"
Through out this blog I have taken shots at people, situations, places, religion, marriage, politics and many more other topics. I titled this the truth hurts to shed light on some things that really go on, but today I am going to turn this on myself. Let me start with explaining what "getting naked," means.
It is not what you think. When I first started my former carrer (that sounds weird) every week we had a meeting. In this meeting we put our numbers up in front of our coworkers and our superiors. Numbers included, appointments, sales, etc. We closed the door and were free to crotique each other and basically tell you if you sucked and if you were pulling your weight. There were no hard feelings but you found out if you were actually doing anything to better yourself. With that being said I am about to "get naked" on my life.
I looked up the definition of 3 words before writing this blog and I am going to go over all 3.
The first word is "womanizer." Here is the first definition I found. "A man who likes many women and has short sexual relationships with them." Well doesn't this suck?! I fit that criteria but I am not proud of it. Was there a point in my life when I was younger that I was proud of it and bragged to friends, sure. This has come back to bite me in my ass and I have earned a reputation in small circles that I can't dodge. To be clear I do not approach every woman with this mentality and was and still ready to give that lifestyle up but that is a different topic. I am putting myself on blast but I am also going to defend myself a little and say at least I am honest and I don't get into a relationship and cheat. The worst part about this is the fact if I meet someone who I want to be with I am going to be honest but I do not know if they could accept it.
Next word and topic "alcoholism." "Continued excessive or compulsive use of alcoholic drinks." Damn, damn, damn! I am now 2 for 2 on these subjects. That definition doesn't have anything to do with the fact that of wether you can stop or not. It just says continued or compulsive use. Something else that I am not proud of and when I really think about it and be honest with myself most bad things that have happened in my life alcohol was involved. Everything from fights, DUI, almost getting killed, hurting people feelings that you care about, sleeping with people that I shouldn't, injuring myself, and the list goes on and on. Not even going to defend myself on this one, my mistakes and I will man up to them.
Final word I looked up was "love." "An object of attachment, devotion, or admiration." I would be a lot better if I was 1 for 3 instead of 3 for 3. Now I am thinking do I love womanizing? No, once again it was fun for a point of my life but I met someone that made me want to give it up. Do I love alcohol or alcoholism? No again. I have had a lot of fun while drinking with friends but I have had more fun when sober and actually experiencing life sober. Do I love my family, true friends, my ambition, my drive? Hell yeah I do.
Haha, thinking if when I am physically naked I looked like this I would be an ugly bastard. The numbers don't lie and I see what I have to do. I am sharing this with you all so feel free to critique me just like my coworkers use to in those meetings. My numbers of 3 for 3 this week suck but I will update you in the followings weeks to check progress. It's on...
It is not what you think. When I first started my former carrer (that sounds weird) every week we had a meeting. In this meeting we put our numbers up in front of our coworkers and our superiors. Numbers included, appointments, sales, etc. We closed the door and were free to crotique each other and basically tell you if you sucked and if you were pulling your weight. There were no hard feelings but you found out if you were actually doing anything to better yourself. With that being said I am about to "get naked" on my life.
I looked up the definition of 3 words before writing this blog and I am going to go over all 3.
The first word is "womanizer." Here is the first definition I found. "A man who likes many women and has short sexual relationships with them." Well doesn't this suck?! I fit that criteria but I am not proud of it. Was there a point in my life when I was younger that I was proud of it and bragged to friends, sure. This has come back to bite me in my ass and I have earned a reputation in small circles that I can't dodge. To be clear I do not approach every woman with this mentality and was and still ready to give that lifestyle up but that is a different topic. I am putting myself on blast but I am also going to defend myself a little and say at least I am honest and I don't get into a relationship and cheat. The worst part about this is the fact if I meet someone who I want to be with I am going to be honest but I do not know if they could accept it.
Next word and topic "alcoholism." "Continued excessive or compulsive use of alcoholic drinks." Damn, damn, damn! I am now 2 for 2 on these subjects. That definition doesn't have anything to do with the fact that of wether you can stop or not. It just says continued or compulsive use. Something else that I am not proud of and when I really think about it and be honest with myself most bad things that have happened in my life alcohol was involved. Everything from fights, DUI, almost getting killed, hurting people feelings that you care about, sleeping with people that I shouldn't, injuring myself, and the list goes on and on. Not even going to defend myself on this one, my mistakes and I will man up to them.
Final word I looked up was "love." "An object of attachment, devotion, or admiration." I would be a lot better if I was 1 for 3 instead of 3 for 3. Now I am thinking do I love womanizing? No, once again it was fun for a point of my life but I met someone that made me want to give it up. Do I love alcohol or alcoholism? No again. I have had a lot of fun while drinking with friends but I have had more fun when sober and actually experiencing life sober. Do I love my family, true friends, my ambition, my drive? Hell yeah I do.
Haha, thinking if when I am physically naked I looked like this I would be an ugly bastard. The numbers don't lie and I see what I have to do. I am sharing this with you all so feel free to critique me just like my coworkers use to in those meetings. My numbers of 3 for 3 this week suck but I will update you in the followings weeks to check progress. It's on...
Saturday, June 11, 2011
Perception isn't Reality
One of my friends has been telling me to really let go on this blog so after a few recent events I will give you a peak into what I really think.
I recently lost my ass and everything I have worked for. It has been a bitch but I will bounce back once again. But times like these are when you really find out who your friends are. So here we go.
I swallowed my pride yesterday and asked someone that I have known most of my life for a job and their response "you need to do something besides take that shot." You know what, fuck you. I know I can go back to banking tomorrow and make decent money but I am not and will not! I have worked my ass off and if someone wants to buy me a shot I am going to take and I don't give a damn about what you think.
Now you want to know what I really think about religion? I think it is for the weak. I can't stand it. Don't come around me with your beliefs and ask me to pray or go to your church. Shits not happening! If that pisses you off think of how many times you have ask someone to pray or go to your church. I might find that offensive but don't go off on your ass because "it's not politically correct." I think religion was created to keep people from running around and going ape shit and also to help people sleep at night.
Since I got on that religion topic lets talk about death. When I see the news and someone had died it doesn't bother me at all unless it is a child. Most people who make the news had that shit coming. And let me guess I'm the ass again for saying that? Really do you give a fuck about the people starvivg in third world countries when you are drinking your five dollar coffee? I have done more for charities and to help people than most of you and deep down inside is it because I really care? Most of the time hell no, it is for perception and to make myself feel good. Can you admit that?
Now lets get to the bar scene and women subject that I always bring up. What I tell you is true. There is more cheating and scandalous shit going on than you would believe. And I'm not about to knock women right now because it is people in general. Once again how many people do you know that have cheated? And you sit there and smile at their significant other and don't say shit. I'm guilty of it too. But you know what else? I have never cheated on anyone and never would. I made a few huge mistakes with someone I cared about and no it wasn't even cheating but I regret it everyday. No matter what I do I can't take it back and a lot of people formed a perception of me that really isn't me. But once again the people who judge me or look down on me can kiss my naked white ass. The person that was harmed by my actions knows me and how sorry I am.
Next subject, I claim to be smarted than most. Guess what, I am not bullshitting. Think of me what you will, call me cocky I don't give a damn. Since I am getting a lot of shit out there I will tell you that I have met 3 people that I really believe are brilliant. I will give them some love without putting their name is this crazy shit. One use to be Ms. C and now she is Mrs. M, one shares the last name with a liquor that I drink all the time, and the other can hit the living piss out of a baseball.
Now that I am calming down a little the main reason that I tick, function, keep moving? There are people who have invested a lot in me. My family and friends pick me up when I'm down. I have a mentor that is prob not to proud of me right now but he means a lot to me and gives me a kick in the ass when i need it. hell i have a teacher from almost 20 years ago that i still talk to monthly and i can't face unless i make shit happen.
Finally to get my point across. This blog really isn't that bad for what i tell my true friends. You don't like it, please delete me from your phone, facebook and everything else. I don't need people around me or fucking with me that can't take me for what I am. I don't need the headaches and or drama. Hopefully your perception of me is becoming a reality.
I recently lost my ass and everything I have worked for. It has been a bitch but I will bounce back once again. But times like these are when you really find out who your friends are. So here we go.
I swallowed my pride yesterday and asked someone that I have known most of my life for a job and their response "you need to do something besides take that shot." You know what, fuck you. I know I can go back to banking tomorrow and make decent money but I am not and will not! I have worked my ass off and if someone wants to buy me a shot I am going to take and I don't give a damn about what you think.
Now you want to know what I really think about religion? I think it is for the weak. I can't stand it. Don't come around me with your beliefs and ask me to pray or go to your church. Shits not happening! If that pisses you off think of how many times you have ask someone to pray or go to your church. I might find that offensive but don't go off on your ass because "it's not politically correct." I think religion was created to keep people from running around and going ape shit and also to help people sleep at night.
Since I got on that religion topic lets talk about death. When I see the news and someone had died it doesn't bother me at all unless it is a child. Most people who make the news had that shit coming. And let me guess I'm the ass again for saying that? Really do you give a fuck about the people starvivg in third world countries when you are drinking your five dollar coffee? I have done more for charities and to help people than most of you and deep down inside is it because I really care? Most of the time hell no, it is for perception and to make myself feel good. Can you admit that?
Now lets get to the bar scene and women subject that I always bring up. What I tell you is true. There is more cheating and scandalous shit going on than you would believe. And I'm not about to knock women right now because it is people in general. Once again how many people do you know that have cheated? And you sit there and smile at their significant other and don't say shit. I'm guilty of it too. But you know what else? I have never cheated on anyone and never would. I made a few huge mistakes with someone I cared about and no it wasn't even cheating but I regret it everyday. No matter what I do I can't take it back and a lot of people formed a perception of me that really isn't me. But once again the people who judge me or look down on me can kiss my naked white ass. The person that was harmed by my actions knows me and how sorry I am.
Next subject, I claim to be smarted than most. Guess what, I am not bullshitting. Think of me what you will, call me cocky I don't give a damn. Since I am getting a lot of shit out there I will tell you that I have met 3 people that I really believe are brilliant. I will give them some love without putting their name is this crazy shit. One use to be Ms. C and now she is Mrs. M, one shares the last name with a liquor that I drink all the time, and the other can hit the living piss out of a baseball.
Now that I am calming down a little the main reason that I tick, function, keep moving? There are people who have invested a lot in me. My family and friends pick me up when I'm down. I have a mentor that is prob not to proud of me right now but he means a lot to me and gives me a kick in the ass when i need it. hell i have a teacher from almost 20 years ago that i still talk to monthly and i can't face unless i make shit happen.
Finally to get my point across. This blog really isn't that bad for what i tell my true friends. You don't like it, please delete me from your phone, facebook and everything else. I don't need people around me or fucking with me that can't take me for what I am. I don't need the headaches and or drama. Hopefully your perception of me is becoming a reality.
what the fuck?
yeah the title is right but i'm not. we al bullshit and pussy foot but here is the question?
what do you want in life?
is it a person?
maybe an object?
maybe something material?
answer?
who the fuck knows besides you?
next answer?
what the fuck are you going to do about it?
what do you want in life?
is it a person?
maybe an object?
maybe something material?
answer?
who the fuck knows besides you?
next answer?
what the fuck are you going to do about it?
Friday, June 10, 2011
My Roommates Rules!!
My roommate is a lovely woman and one of my best friends so I have her rules for when she goes out of town, they are awesome!!
She leaves a list of things to do for her muts/dogs but then on page 2 she leaves my list and I am going to share it with you word for word!
Rules:
1. Do not bring hookers home
2. Lock doors and don't let dogs out
3. Don't cook anything drunk
4. Don't forget to come home and take care of dogs
5. Do not have sex in my bed or couch
6. Don't forget to do anything on other sheet
7. If you wash clothes, clean lent tray!
Thank you! I love you (she use the girly heart symbol)! Be safe!
Now in my defense I would never bring a hooker home, I would go to a motel/hotel depending on the price. I wouldn't have sex in her bed because my bed is awesome! These metal rails are the deuce!
I am also an expert at cooking while wasted. I owned a restaurant until last week and I may have gone in there once or twice after leaving multiple bars.
I have only let a dog out once and no it wasn't Benji. It was Emma and or Sammy and they got back in fine.
I do wash clothes a lot! But she will tell you that I do most of the cleaning here and I never leave a mess!
I hope you enjoyed now it's time for me to run along get smashed and find that motel!
She leaves a list of things to do for her muts/dogs but then on page 2 she leaves my list and I am going to share it with you word for word!
Rules:
1. Do not bring hookers home
2. Lock doors and don't let dogs out
3. Don't cook anything drunk
4. Don't forget to come home and take care of dogs
5. Do not have sex in my bed or couch
6. Don't forget to do anything on other sheet
7. If you wash clothes, clean lent tray!
Thank you! I love you (she use the girly heart symbol)! Be safe!
Now in my defense I would never bring a hooker home, I would go to a motel/hotel depending on the price. I wouldn't have sex in her bed because my bed is awesome! These metal rails are the deuce!
I am also an expert at cooking while wasted. I owned a restaurant until last week and I may have gone in there once or twice after leaving multiple bars.
I have only let a dog out once and no it wasn't Benji. It was Emma and or Sammy and they got back in fine.
I do wash clothes a lot! But she will tell you that I do most of the cleaning here and I never leave a mess!
I hope you enjoyed now it's time for me to run along get smashed and find that motel!
Thursday, June 9, 2011
Random redneck thoughts!
I laugh at the movie Forrest Gump for all the wrong reasons.
Women stop complaining about periods once you are 20. you have had enough years to get use to it. if i was kicked in my man parts 5 to 7 days a month i would stop complaining and deal with after a few years.
your religion sucks too
stop hating on people who look different
most people look to retire at 65. porn stars should start thinking about it a lot earlier!
there are way too many crayons. damn box is more colorful than my clothes
horror movies blow for the most part
don't ever tell a woman something that you don't want her to tell another woman. not possible
most women fake orgasms, just go with it and occasionally you might hit one out of the park
don't bring kids into bars, i will cuss loud on purpose
i want to be cremated because i hate dirt and bugs now
curse someone out occasionally, it makes you feel better
if you can't keep a plant from dying don't buy a dog
ketchup is overrated
i am way to much of a pansy to sky dive
i still don't know what's eating gilbert grape or whatever his name is
minority comedians can be racist and its accepted. and i think the shit is hilarious
if you fall in public i am laughing at you, and i don't care how old you are
men and women stop burping out loud! its nasty
and chew with your mouth closed!!
was anne frank's diary ever proof read or spell checked?
there are usually hot women at harris teeter
i want an old school starter jacket this winter or maybe a triple fat goose
alcohol is worse than the reefer and where the hell is dave chapelle?
my phone number was once wrote on a bathroom stall and someone called me
girls don't go number 2...ever
maybe i should do nude modeling, i will have to lay off the beer first
i want a drink you can have the two step
evolution is correct or i will be a monkey...that makes no sense
ice cream is awesome!
beat your kids, grounding them doesn't do shit
cheerleaders should play volleyball at halftime of football games
i love vegetables
if you don't ask someone there name then you don't have to worry about not knowing it
i saw a guy put his finger down a girls pants 2 days ago, she almost whipped his arse and prob should've.
why do assholes always act up when something goes on down/uptown charlotte. i stay my ass away from uptown because of it
i love freaks, they come out at night
out of time for now, be back real soon!!
Women stop complaining about periods once you are 20. you have had enough years to get use to it. if i was kicked in my man parts 5 to 7 days a month i would stop complaining and deal with after a few years.
your religion sucks too
stop hating on people who look different
most people look to retire at 65. porn stars should start thinking about it a lot earlier!
there are way too many crayons. damn box is more colorful than my clothes
horror movies blow for the most part
don't ever tell a woman something that you don't want her to tell another woman. not possible
most women fake orgasms, just go with it and occasionally you might hit one out of the park
don't bring kids into bars, i will cuss loud on purpose
i want to be cremated because i hate dirt and bugs now
curse someone out occasionally, it makes you feel better
if you can't keep a plant from dying don't buy a dog
ketchup is overrated
i am way to much of a pansy to sky dive
i still don't know what's eating gilbert grape or whatever his name is
minority comedians can be racist and its accepted. and i think the shit is hilarious
if you fall in public i am laughing at you, and i don't care how old you are
men and women stop burping out loud! its nasty
and chew with your mouth closed!!
was anne frank's diary ever proof read or spell checked?
there are usually hot women at harris teeter
i want an old school starter jacket this winter or maybe a triple fat goose
alcohol is worse than the reefer and where the hell is dave chapelle?
my phone number was once wrote on a bathroom stall and someone called me
girls don't go number 2...ever
maybe i should do nude modeling, i will have to lay off the beer first
i want a drink you can have the two step
evolution is correct or i will be a monkey...that makes no sense
ice cream is awesome!
beat your kids, grounding them doesn't do shit
cheerleaders should play volleyball at halftime of football games
i love vegetables
if you don't ask someone there name then you don't have to worry about not knowing it
i saw a guy put his finger down a girls pants 2 days ago, she almost whipped his arse and prob should've.
why do assholes always act up when something goes on down/uptown charlotte. i stay my ass away from uptown because of it
i love freaks, they come out at night
out of time for now, be back real soon!!
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